Hello and Welcome to Elpis

First things first, thank you for visiting my site. Whether you are here because you are curious about counselling or therapy, you are a fellow counsellor who is looking for inspiration for your own site or just looking to nick some ideas, or whether you are at a point in your life when you are seriously considering seeing a counsellor, you are very welcome.

A truth of modern life is that most people at some point will find they are having difficulties in some way with the world of feelings, thoughts and relationships in which live. These struggles are often influenced and exacerbated by previous experiences or events in our past which can then influence the way we think and feel about ourselves, other people and the wider world.

One of the truisms I have accepted since becoming a therapist and spending many thousands of hours talking to people through my work and many hundreds of hours during my own personal therapy, is that no two people experience things in exactly the same way. Every human being is an individual and as such will experience things in life differently to everyone else. This can be really confusing when you are faced with a situation in which you are struggling, but when you look through the window of other people’s experience – either friends/family or the now permanently invasive digital world we all have to exist within – and see other people who have had similar experiences or at a similar point in their life, doing really well and not seemingly affected by life in the same way you are, well, this can be confusing to say the least.

This confusion can lead to anxiety or depression, it can exacerbate already flagging self-esteem and confidence and really make for difficult feelings and thoughts around self and also the world in which we live.

If we then consider the impact of childhood experience or any trauma or losses that have been experienced – as we all do as we go through life, loss/grief/trauma are unfortunately an integral part of the human experience and as much as we may wish to, we cannot avoid them – then the whole psychological cocktail can become chaotic, scary, angry, confused, anxious and overwhelming. So we begin to act as if we are faced with the prospect of being locked alone in a room with Donald Trump for an hour, we avoid things, feel anxious/depressed, struggle to make decisions/think clearly and start to sometimes feel that we do not want to be a part of any of it.

Research shows that one in six people in the UK will experience some form of mental health issue during their lifetime, I think the true figure if actually much higher than that, but currently NHS provision for mental health is in absolute chaos and lots of people are falling through the cracks and not actually accessing the services they need so desperately.

In my own small way I hope to plug some of those gaps and offer people who need it, the psychological, emotional and practical support they need to feel better in their lives and grow into the people they really wish to be.

MARK O’LEARY – ELPIS COUNSELLING

MBACP (Accred): On BACP Accredited Register of Counsellors and Psychotherapists

It is common for people to feel that they are weak or useless or failing in some way if they reach out and seek support for what they are going through. The British ‘stiff upper lip’ still exists and often people hold a belief that talking to someone about their thoughts and feelings is wrong and they should be able to ‘just deal with it’.

The problem with this is that over time negative thoughts, feelings and experiences can build up to a point we cant push them down or away any more and we start to feel overwhelmed, stressed as well as emotionally, mentally and physically unwell.

Therfore, if you are reading this and it is the first time you have thought about or looked for a counsellor or therapist then you have already done one of the most difficult parts of therapy. Realising that you need some support and being able to own what is happening to you and not ignoring it is often the most difficult step to take in the road to a happier and contented life.

The road to understanding ourselves and why we think, feel and behave the way we do (even though it makes us feel bad) is often a very rocky and bumpy one. My experience tells me that those who are motivated and open to the prospect of change can get to a place where they are better able to make their way through this wonderfully strange, unpredictable, confusing and often scary world, with a better understanding of their place and the place of other people within it.

If you wish to find out more about counselling or psychotherapy please contact me and if you think it is for you, we can make an appointment that might help you change your life and lead you down a road of self discovery and clarity which will enable you to make the most of yourself and the people around you.

How to Choose a Therapist? Blogs!

The eternal question of, ‘How do I find the Right Therapist for Me?’ is, well, eternal I suppose, and also blooming difficult to answer. Every therapist is different and has a set of skills and experience that is uniquely theirs.

I have been ‘blogging’, since March last year and I think my blogs give a good sense of me as a therapist and also a person. If you are considering me as a therapist I would suggest that if you have a read through some of my blogs they will help you get a idea of what to expect if you choose to meet me and engage with me as a client. The link to my blogs is on the main menu bar above (on the right hand side).

If you have any questions or are not sure of anything, please just contact me and I will do what I can to answer any questions or alleviate the concerns.

Feel free to have a mooch around the website as well. If you have any feedback that is always welcome too.

Thanks for the visit,

Mark